9 Sex Tips You’ll Actually Try

The scalp contains tons of nerve endings—that’s why that mini-scalp massage when you get your hair cut always feels so good.

Even though the touch is G-rated, the skin-on-skin contact can trigger a flow of bonding hormones like oxytocin that can make you both feel more connected, explains Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First.

And because the act isn’t automatically linked to sex, it can pave the way for a long evening of back-and-forth foreplay before the main event, which often gets lost in long-term relationships. (Here’s how to give yourself an awesome scalp massage.)

Start with making out high-school style and then amp up the action by having her straddle your knee. Here, you can rock back and forth while you’re kissing, which provides direct stimulation to her clitoris, says Emily Morse, a sex expert and host of the podcast Sex With Emily.

Related: 13 Tips For Better-Than-Ever Sex

Experts agree that plain old ice cubes can make any encounter extremely hot. Not only does the chill of the ice stimulate the same part of the nervous system that’s responsible for arousal, but the sensation jolts your brain away from work and into the here-and-now.

Try running one along her hips and up her thighs, or ask her to do the same to you, suggests Barnard. (Eat your way to better sex with these foods.)

Women who used a water- or silicone-based lubricant rated sexual pleasure and satisfaction higher than when they had intercourse without a lubricant, according to a recent Indiana University study of nearly 2,500 women.

To avoid interrupting the action, have lube on the bedside table or in a convenient drawer. Then, help her apply it sensually during foreplay, suggests Barnard. (Check out this Almost Naked Organic Personal Lubricant from the Men’s Health store.)

Fantasy sharing sounds great in theory, but in practice it can be complicated—does your wife really know what you and Margot Robbie would do together? (And do you really want to hear what she’d do with George Clooney?)

Instead, share the fantasies that star her. Start by giving the play-by-play of some of the exceptionally hot moments you’ve had together over the years. You’ve had them before, so who says you can’t have them again? (Keep it up with these 3 Ways to Fall Back In Love.)

Kama Sutra–inspired coupling may seem exciting, but if you’re looking for pure pleasure, the deceptively simple Coital Alignment Technique (also known as CAT) may be all you need.

In the past two decades, studies have found that this technique consistently leads to female orgasm, even for women who have reported difficulty achieving orgasm from penetration in the past, says Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., research scientist at Indiana University and author of Sex Made Easy.

To do it: Start in missionary, but move downward during the thrust as she moves upward. The point is to achieve maximum clitoral stimulation, so you might have to experiment a bit until the position of your penis gives her the most pleasure.

(For more ideas, give these 11 new sex positions a whirl.)

Vacations may only come once or twice a year, but you can have hot vacation-style sex any day.

“When you’re on vacation, your focus is primarily on pleasure. To have a similar benefit, you need to get into a similar mindset at home,” says Cohen.

Related: How to Have Mind-Blowing Vacation Sex—Without Leaving Your House

One way to do that is to get rid of as many distractions as possible. For some couples, that’s renting a hotel room in town for an evening. For others, it’s simply spending the night (or a Saturday morning while kids are at soccer practice) in the guest room. Not seeing evidence of your everyday lives can make it easier to totally let loose.  

The article 11 Sex Tips You’ll Actually Try originally ran on Prevention.com.